Movie Musings: Wait, I've Seen this Before!

So my wife found a Blu-ray edition of It Happened One Night by Criterion Collection for a great price at Costco (of all places). We had the DVD release for quite a few years, but figured we could replace it with Criterion's clean up copy.

So yeah, this print looks great, but what surprised me was the sound. Holy crap did that audio sound as crisp and natural, as if the film were just made yesterday instead of 1934. I shouldn't be too surprised, Criterion always does a fine job with restoration. But before this turns into a full fledged commercial for the Criterion Collection (too late), I had this odd epiphany while watching the movie.

I wrote earlier this year about how much Ex Machina reminded me of Ghost in the Shell. I have an upcoming post about the similarities between Dune and Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind. So I must have movie comparisons on my mind. But It Happened One Night was something different. It reminded me of a ton of different movies while watching it. But the reason for that is because It Happened One Night pretty much refined the romantic comedy genre into a a crystallized perfect specimen... in 1934! Nearly all mainstream romantic comedies that followed have borrowed in some way from this classic film. Some have modified and improved elements. Most just copied and pasted the sequences and moments wholesale into their films.

Memorable scene? Sure, but there is more to this movie.

This isn't necessarily a bad thing, It Happened One Night is a very entertaining film. It has some great dialogue, two excellent performances, and moves a great pace. Frank Capra does a fine job putting the whole thing together, and working with the chemistry between Clark Gable and Claudette Colbert. Sure every time this film is mentioned all you see is the infamous hitchhiking scene. But this scene works even better in the context of the film because of the adventures and interaction building up to it. This movie may be considered the great grandfather of romantic comedies, but it works so well: you laugh and you swoon. What more do you want in this type of film.

We are actually getting away from the influence of It Happened One Night in this modern era of movies. Fellow writer Richard Bellush at Richard's Pretension has pointed out that many modern "romance" films view romance through a cynical lens. Characters who fall in romantic love are mocked and considered the oddballs. The comedy stems from how bizarre these characters are. After years of Hollywood basing their films off of It Happened One Night, it is a pretty refreshing.

That said, I'm a softy at heart (check out my review of Oh My Goddess if you don't believe me). So something like It Happened One Night or When Harry Met Sally still work great for me.

I love the whole discussion about dunking doughnuts.

What is interesting is that even though It Happened One Night feels overly familiar, through no fault of its own, I still enjoy it. But on a revisit of North by Northwest, I found it really hard to get over the fact that I knew every plot twist and sequence because so many movies have borrowed (and yes lets just say it, ripped off) the 1959 classic thriller. I wonder if it has something to do with the genres. With a thriller you are there to enjoy the twists and the build up of tension. With those things neutralized the movie is less entertaining. I enjoyed North by Northwest, but not as much as I enjoyed rematching Rear Window. Might have to take a closer look at why in a future blog post.

But for It Happened One Night, I am there to watch the interaction between Gable and Colbert. I'm there to see those characters work their way out of those situations. And I'm there for fun ride. All those things hold up well, and make it a true classic, not just of the genre, but in the space of all film history.

Have you ever watched an older film that inspired a whole slew of imitations? Did that impact your reaction to the original?

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Hercules Unchained (1959) – MST3K Review

Summary:

Taking pieces of it story from classic Greek myths and classic Greek tragedy, we get Hercules Unchained. It all starts with Hercules (Steve Reeves) returning from his adventures with the Argonauts. He travels with his wife Iole (Sylva Koscina) and a young Ulysses (Gabriel Antonini) to his home city of Thebes. Before he can get there, he gets in a battle with Primo Carnera as the demi-god Antaeus. Herc is able to defeat this clown and continues on his way. He discovers his old pal Oedipus (Cesare Fantoni), was deposed by his own greedy sons. Hercules vows to end the destructive conflict between the squabbling brothers and return Thebes to a peaceful rule.

Herc leaves Iole in the not so trustworthy hands of one of the brothers Eteocles (Sergio Fantoni) and takes a secret message to the other brother Polynices (Mimmo Palmara). Before he can complete the mission, Herc drinks from the waters of forgetfulness (as the voiceover helpfully tells us, but doesn’t bother to mention it to Herc). Our hero falls asleep and is captured by the lovely queen Omphale (Sylvia Lopez) and taken to the land of Lydia. Ulysses uses his quick thinking to pretend to be a deaf mute servant and is taken along as well.

Can Ulysses bring back Hercules memories, before the demi-god becomes completely ensnared in a life of sweet lovin’ with the evil queen? Will Iole be thrown into a pit of tigers? Will Hercules save Thebes? Will the bad-dubbing blow your mind? The answers to these questions and more are revealed in Hercules Unchained.

Movie Review:

Antaeus finds everything hilarious, even his
eventual beat down by the Herc.

A couple years before this movie came out, Steve Reeves stared in Hercules, a film that covered the Jason and the Argonauts story from Herc’s point of view (and with lots and lots of changes to the original myth). American distributor Joseph E. Levine created a marketing campaign for the flick after picking it up fairly cheap. It made a bundle and soon all kinds of Italian muscle men movies were being made and unleashed on the world.

For many folks, Hercules means Steve Reeves. The irony is, he only played the role twice. But the film was so popular (and aired on television so often) that people always associate the role with him. This changed in the 1990s when Kevin Sorbo became associated with the character. I will always hold a spot in my heart for the ultra-cheesy Hercules with Lou Ferrigno.

By I digress (as usual). How does Hercules Unchained measure up? Well it’s a bit of a mess actually. The main problem is the fact that two stories compete for screen time with a subplot or two and you end up with a muddled blob of confusion. The film could have functioned just fine if it focused on Hercules’ role in saving Thebes from the feuding brothers. You also could have had a fun movie with Hercules and Ulysses attempting to escape the isle of the evil queen. But to fuse the two together ends up making everything a jumbled mess. There is no clear narrative here.

Ulysses is sitting right there when Antaeus announces
himself.

Now keep in mind, this is a badly dubbed and edited version of Hercules Unchained . And I’m not talking about poor matching to lip flaps (which is in full swing as well). I’m talking about a script that can’t clearly express what the hell is going on. There are plenty of lines that make no sense at all. I’m not sure if this was a sloppy translation, or a too literal translation (which can be just as bad).

An early example is when Hercules runs into the demi-god Anteaus, who demands Iole as his prize. When the thug first appears he says something like “I’m Anteaus and this is my valley. You must pay a toll to pass”. When Herc finally battles the clown, he defeats him pretty easily. He throws the giant to the ground and then turns to leave. But Anteaus just gets back up again. Herc fights him, defeats him, and then Anteaus gets up again. About the third time this happens Ulysses says, “Oh, this must be Anteaus, the legendary man who gets his strength from the earth. Don’t let him touch the ground Hercules!”

Ok, Anteaus announced himself at least once (I’m pretty sure he says his name about three times). Ulysses was standing right there the whole time. The line should have been something like; “I just remembered that Anteaus gets his strength from touching the ground.” Instead, Ulysses comes across like a moron who isn’t paying attention when danger threatens. Of course Iole had just sang a song. So maybe the sound of her voice deafened him and he missed Anteus grand entrance.

This is only a small example of the script issues in Hercules Unchained. It’s much worse with the convoluted brother plot and the evil queen nonsense. If we can look past the bad script, how are the characters treated. Well Hercules comes across as mostly brawn and not much brain. He seems really lazy in this movie, preferring to loaf around and sleep rather than have adventures. Only near the end, when he tries to save Thebes with his special ops team, does he seem like the legendary Hercules we know and love.

Ulysses, teenager of many wiles, helps return
Hercules memories.

I do like how Ulysses is a teenager, but shows all the cunning and craft that his older self will be known for. He deceives the Queen’s men by pretending to be a deaf, mute servant. He figures out how the waters of forgetfulness are being used to keep Herc enslaved. He’s the one that devises the rescue plan. We even get to see him use his legendary bow to save Hercules from a leaping tiger.

The ladies in the film are fairly predictable. Iole is the loving dutiful wife, who pines for her husband while he is away on his mission. Queen Omphale is a complete vamp, who tarts around the palace with her nymphy serving wenches. She uses men until she’s bored, then turns them into statues with the help of some Egyptian priests. She wicked, selfish and sexy – a theme you’ll see in plenty of Italian Muscleman movies that followed this one.

It’s hard to judge the performances here, because the dubbing is so poor. Everything seems a bit over the top and theatrical. The evil brother Etocles is really chewing the scenery here. Omphale is vamping into overdrive. Even Ulysses is playing it pretty broadly. But in a way the whole film is huge, over the top and going for an epic feel on a smaller budget.

A cast of hundreds prepares for the siege of Thebes.

That’s not to say that the visuals aren’t up to snuff. There’s some great location shooting in this film, with the high cliffs of Greece looking really impressive. The entire end sequence with the battle in front of the gates of Thebes uses a cast of hundreds. There are full siege towers rolling up, chariots, archers, infantry and all kinds of chaos. Even the interior sets of Thebes and Omphale’s palace have a large scope to them. You can tell this movie had a good sized budget and that a lot of the money was put on the screen.

Finally there is the old fashioned score by Enzio Masetti. It’s really channeling the classic Hollywood scores of the time, the likes that Miklos Rosza wrote for Ben Hur or Quo Vadis. It’s big, bold and brassy and fits Hercules Unchained like a glove.

The movie’s pacing is what keeps it from being as entertaining as it can be. The movie starts really, really slowly. Herc doesn't meet his first challenge, Antaeus until nearly 15 minutes in. That's an eternity in movie time. The whole sequence with the evil queen also meanders around. It is mostly scenes of Herc lounging around making kissy faces with Omphale. Ulysses schemes are fun to watch, but the whole thing just slogs along. Once the escape attempt starts, things pick up, and the finale battle in front of Thebes is a hoot. I had never seen Reeves in the role before, but he makes a very good Herc, and seems to be having some fun in the part. But the whole film is just messy enough to make it a good fit for Joel and Bots to riff on.

Episode Review:  

"Come to your sugar momma, Herc."

This was the first of the sword and sandal flicks that Mystery Science Theater 3000 would riff on. It wouldn’t be the last. From this moment forward, the sword and sandal flick would be a regular target for the show during the Comedy Central years. More Hercules, Maciste and Colossus films would come down the pipe and provide plenty of laughs for all of us.

I was always a bit puzzled as to why Hercules Unchained was the first one they tackled, instead of Steve Reeves first pass at the role in Hercules. It is obvious from the opening of the film that we are coming in at the end of some kind of grand adventure. There are some brief intros, but nothing else to really develop the characters. We’re just expected to know how these people are and how they all know each other.

Maybe the crew at Best Brains figured this would just add to the confusion that Joel and Bots feel as they watch. Most of the comments deal with how none of the boys can figure out who the characters are and what the hell is going on. This causes the riffing to get a bit stale in places, as all they are really saying is some variant of “Wow, is this movie confusing.”

This is Herc's beautiful wife. This is Herc's beautiful
city. How did he get here?

Some of the best jokes come around when Herc is first affected by the waters of forgetfulness. Tom comments that the spring and it’s surrounding rocks “Look like a Star Trek set.” After Herc takes a big gulp and starts wandering around with a vacant look on his face Crow says in his best Steve Reeves voice, “I’ve forgotten everything but I still can’t get ‘Afternoon Delight’ out of my head.” Later as Herc is still looking a bit dull and staring at the Queen Joel does his best Talking Heads imitation with “This is not my beautiful wife. I ask my self, how did I get here?”

Later in the film when Herc tries to save Iole and gets trapped in a pit full of tigers the boys threaten to call Betty White because of all the injured horses and tigers they keep seeing. As one tiger jumps on Hercules’ back Joel says, “Hobbes get off me!” He eventually joins the battle raging in front of the gates of Thebes a bunch of warriors are wearing white caps that flop forward. Tom declares it a battle of “Smurfs vs. Skins”. When Hercules is riding around in a chariot and using grappling hooks and rope to pull down siege towers, Crow comments, "Hey it's just like The Empire Strikes Back!" Tom adds, "But it's not very good."

Joel and the bots attempt to live it up, ancient Greek
style. But Gypsy's "song" causes much pain.

The host segments are a bit of a mixed bag. The episode starts with Joel attempting to subject the bots to “wash and wax day”. It ends in robot tears. For the invention exchange the mad scientists create designer colors for roaches.Joel creates the Steve-o-meter. It allows the user to determine if Steve Allen already thought of their idea. Turns out that Steve Allen already thought up the Steve-o-meter.  Before the mad scientists send the movie, it turns out Steve Reeves is helping them out around the lab. Of course its Mike dressed up as the muscled actor. At the first break Crow and Tom enjoy some ancient Greek living as Joel peels grapes and Gypsy attempts to sing while strumming the lyre with her head. It’s not impressive or relaxing. For the next break everyone comes up with his or her own food with a magic property, inspired by the water of forgetfulness. Later on, Crow and Tom interrogate Joel about what Herc and “the nice lady” are doing all day, especially after they start kissing and the screen goes dark. Joel won’t tell them a thing. Finally, after the movie ends, they try to figure out why there was a huge increase in these types of movies in the 50s and 60s. All kinds of ideas are mentioned, including Joseph Campbell. Tom ruins the whole thing by giving a dull pragmatic answer – they were cheap to make, sell and distribute and always made a profit.

In many ways the highlights balance out some dead spots, and the constant riffs on how confused they are. The pacing here is a little off, almost as if the writing crew wasn’t sure how to best tackle the film. I chalk this up to the fact that Hercules Unchained was the first sword and sandal flick. The next one they tried Hercules Against the Moonmen is a classic episode. Here, the riffing ends up being just average.

The evil queen and her nymphettes vamp it up!

I give it three badly dubbed Italians out of five.

This episode is available on The Mystery Science Theater 3000 Collection: Volume 7.

Santa Claus (1959) –MST3K Review

Summary

Ok, so just go along with this. Santa Claus (Jose Elias Moreno) lives in a huge castle on some clouds hovering above the earth with Merlin. Yeah, the wizard Merlin! He appears to spend most of his time wailing away on his huge pipe organ while watching an army of international children slave away in his toy factory while singing traditional songs of their nation. He's quite jolly even if he also has the deranged eyes of a serial killer when he laughs.

As Santa prepares for Christmas Eve, Satan, yes that Satan, sends his devilish minion Pitch (Jose Luis Aguirre) to earth to do evil and stop Santa. Pitch does his best to tempt the super-cute Lupita (Lupita Quezadas) to steal a doll, but she resists. Santa watches from his cloud castle and cheers her on. Pitch shifts his focus to three wicked boys who want to kidnap Santa. Nice kids. It all erupts into an epic throw-down between good and evil. And your brain will probably erupt too once you’ve seen Santa Claus.

Movie Review

This is one of those movies that is so insane, so beyond anything you can really imagine that my summary just can’t do it justice. I didn’t mention the bizarre song and dance number that opens the film, the mechanical reindeer, the hallucinations, the magic flower, the huge huge mouth, the eyeball on a tube, the manic organ playing… I have to stop now or else my brain will melt again. Let’s just put it this way, if you love odd, colorful, cheerful and yet disturbing films, run, don’t walk, and find a copy of Santa Claus.

Rumor has it that this film was made to introduce the concept of Santa Claus to Mexico. Previously, Christmas was closely connected to the actual birth of Christ as well as the nativity. Check out Disney’s Three Caballeros to see Mexican Christmas traditions in 1944. But a little over a decade later, Mexico needed Santa and director Rene Cardona was there.

Everything seems coordinated to add to the insanity. The plot, while it makes sense in a basic way is just all over the place with the Santa mythos: no North Pole, no Elves, no Rudolph, no Mrs. Claus, no Lee Majors. Instead it’s slave children, bizarre surveillance equipment, Merlin and mechanical reindeer that laugh horribly, oh so horribly. Where did these ideas come from? And why pit Satan directly against Santa? No clue, but it creates drama, that’s for sure.

The acting is broad to put it mildly. Everyone here is so over the top that they are nearing Everest. Only Lupita seems to be playing a normal little girl, not really acting, but just being herself. But Santa? Insane and jolly. Pitch? Insane and evil. Three bratty boys? Bratty with mild insanity. Merlin? Doddering and insane. You get the picture. Actually the kids are the best actors in the film, a real rarity, but when you are going against so much ham, well you have to look good.

Everything is bright and rich in color in this film. Pitch isn’t just red, he’s RED. The reindeer are WHITE. You get the idea. The sets in Santa’s castle are huge, gaudy and actually kind of impressive. The location filming for the earthly shenanigans works well enough. The whole film is competently filmed. Some scenes don’t make complete sense, but its because the version shown on MST3K is actually edited for time.

This is easily one of the oddest holiday movies I’ve ever seen. It’s like a glimpse into a fever dream of a Mexican kid who at too many candy canes before falling asleep. It’s perfect for Mike and the bots.

Episode Review

This movie is a big Christmas gift for MST3K crew. It’s so deliriously out there that the riffing practically writes itself. The whole thing just hums along with great line after great line. Really it’s one of my favorite riffing sessions by the crew.

Let’s get a few things out of the way first. The opening sequence with Santa playing the organ and all the little children singing various songs from whatever country they are from gets blasted by all kinds of ethnic jokes. Some might find it offensive, but Mike and the bots go for everyone equally, even the American kids. The whole thing is so ridiculous that even when they get a bit mean, it’s still funny. And honestly this humor is nowhere near as aggressive as we saw in the Sci-fi channel years with the rants against Japan in Invasion of the Neptune Men or the Canada bashing in The Final Sacrifice.

After the musical portion of the film concludes, then the jokes switch back to commenting on the oddities before us. But this episode also provides plenty of naughty humor by the boys too, especially when the huge mouth makes an appearance. Really the movie is asking for it, but I’m always surprised when they throw in blatant innuendo.

But the guy who brings on the most hilarious lines is Pitch. With his skintight outfit, his gadding about and his over the top expressions he’s the prefect target. When he and Santa face off it’s the perfect fuel for the riffing fire and it’s hilarious stuff. Between Santa's deranged eyes and ponderous voice acting (thanks to a dubber who didn't know what he was getting into I suspect) you start to wonder if he really is the hero. But Pitch is so awful with his mug pulling and scampering, that he's no better. That leaves us with the teeth rotting stories about Lupita and the rich kid who never sees his parents. Ah, who am I kidding, this whole movie is wonderful riffing fodder.

For the host segments you get a solid set of laughs. First off Mike and the bots are preparing to go caroling, but a badly placed mug of hot chocolate creates disaster. Next, everyone exchanges gifts, even the mads, and it’s all very odd. At the first break, Mike and the bots are Santa Klaws a rock band with holiday cheer! After the next movie segment the bots contact Mikes family on Earth to warm his heart. For the next break you get one of my favorite songs from the series, “Merry Christmas… if that’s OK”. It’s all about how to be politically correct during the holidays. The finale has a snow day on the satellite and Pitch visits the Mads when Santa comes in for a wrestling match.

This is a holiday favorite in our house. Nonstop laughs, a bizarre film and combined with Jack Frost and Santa Claus Conquers the Martians it makes for a triple threat of MST3K Christmas goodness.

I give it five prancing Pitches out of five.

This episode is available on the Mystery Science Theater 3000 Volume XVI.

Santa offering a gift? Or thirsting for your soul... you decide.

The Giant Gila Monster (1959) – MST3K Review

Summary:

For the teens in a small town in Texas, there isn’t much to do but talk about cars, listen to a popular radio show and hang out with Chase Winstead (Don Sullivan) the good looking musical tow truck driver. Well all that is about to change when a ginormous Gila Monster starts devouring folks, smashing cars and making a general mess of things.

Sheriff Jeff (Fred Graham) does his best to figure out what is going on (there are no witnesses after each horrible attack). But everything is out of his jurisdiction. Luckily he’s friends with Chase and since the lad is the smartest person in the town, they work together to figure out what is going on. Prepare yourself for a a renegade tow truck driver, songs, a severely drunken DJ, driving around in jalopies, and an actor named Shug. But nothing can prepare you for The Giant Gila Monster.

Movie Review:

There is something with huge lizards with names that start with “G” that just fascinated folks in the 50s and 60s. First Japan gave us Godzilla. Then the flying turtle Gamera exploded on our screens. In between we get Gila! Well this critter doesn’t have a cool name. In fact some folks say the animal in this movie is actually a Beaded lizard. But the Giant Beaded Lizard just doesn’t have the same ring. And it doesn’t start with a “G”!

When you boil it all down, this is your typical 50s monster movie, with the misunderstood teens who see the menace but can’t get the adults to believe them. Oh, The Blob, what have you wrought? In fact this film only came out a year after The Blob and has many of the same beats. Chase is really a good kid at heart. Sure he like cars and racing them. But he’s not a real delinquent. In fact Sherrif Jeff goes out of his way to explain that the kids in the town would be getting into a whole lot more trouble is Chase was around. This doesn’t stop grumpy Mr. Wheeler (Bob Thompson) from determining that Chase is the source of all the bad things going on in town.

Not only is Chase a good kid, but he’s also got a little sister who has to walk with braces. So in a touching side story, he tries to raise enough money to get these braces. To do this, he is attempting to start a singing career. Or more like he is discovered after he rescues the drunken DJ “Steamroller” Smith. He’s see’s Elvis-like potential in the kid. Odd since Chase only really sings a super mellow song called “Laugh Children, Laugh”.

But wait, what about the Giant Gila Monster? Well he spends most of the film wandering around watching teens make out (and sticking his tongue out at them, the pervert!) and eating random people. The creature is a fairly large specimen put on a model railroad set and let loose. This combined with reaction shots is supposed to show how darn huge this monster truly is. Sadly the model trees, bushes and cars aren’t too convincing and you end up giggling. My favorite scene is when Gila goes nutty and attacks a train. The combination of the obviously annoyed lizard, the trashed train and the overlaid screams of the passengers is pure bad movie gold.

Luckily the Gila Monster is not the best actor of the bunch. Don Sullivan does a good job as the likable Chase. While the script saddles him with some lame dialogue he does a decent job with it. His singing voice isn’t half bad either. But once again, the songwriters need to be hit on the head a few times. The two songs Chase performs are pretty bad. But the  “Sing Whenever I Sing” song became an instant MST3K classic.

Fred Graham as the Sheriff isn’t too bad either. He treats Chase more like a son, which is a bit odd. But the script ends up making the Sheriff look like a moron who doesn’t have any power to do anything. Jeff ignores all the obvious signs of some kind of animal. Even when things start happening he keeps saying how he doesn’t have the jurisdiction to act. He’s one of the most pointless law enforcers I’ve seen in a movie. But he is willing it listen to the teens and believe that they mean well, even if they are a bit noisy with their rock music and fast cars.

No the worst actor in the flick is Mr. Thompson playing Mr. Wheeler. Not sure how he got picked to be the human antagonist here, but he flubs lines, looks lost most of the movie and comes across more whiney then aggravated and aggressive. The big success of his performance is that you want him to be eaten by the Giant Gila Monster by the end of the flick.

All told, it’s not a bad low budget monster movie. Not really scary, but still a lot of fun when the Gila Monster is smashing the train set. The movie does take quite a while go get going. It focuses on teen/town drama for the first half. But once the Gila destroys a gasoline truck, things pick up a bit. It all leads to an explosive finale and a couple musical numbers. What more could you ask for? Joel and bots of course.

Episode Review:  

This was the second episode of the forth season of the series, and by this point the crew at Best Brains was well versed in the art of riffing a bad movie. They had been tested with the previous episode Space Travelers (which was a really dull episode all the way around). But this flick seemed to invigorate them, maybe because it was their bread and butter – the 50s monster movie.

The Giant Gila Monster starts out a little slow in the movie and riffing department because of the all the teen/town drama going on. The movie gives us a little bit of giant lizard action, and the boys have a great time with it. But when the things get mired in talky scenes the riffing slows down a bit. By this time they had pretty much used all the gags about teens, cars, making out and drunken hobos in previous films and I think they were at a loss here.

But then the Gila Monster destroys a gasoline tanker with his tongue and all bets are off.

Of course I can’t discount the humor in the musical scenes. When Chase whips out his first song earlier in the film, it seems to invigorate the riffing. First off, Chase is singing a little tune that sounds like “I sing whenever I sing whenever I SIIIINNNGGGGG!” while hammering a fender. This becomes an instant classic. With Joel or the bots having any character start singing this little ditty as they enter or exit the screen. It also became a reoccurring riff right into the Sci-fi Channel years.

Chase’s second song describing how “The Lord said laugh children, laugh” over and over again, provides some great riffing fodder. Joel wonders if the Lord said it that many times. Crow replies, “That’s why Deuteronomy is so long.” The inane lyrics combined with Chase strumming a ukulele to his adoring is hilarious stuff.

Another running joke comes with the fact that nearly everyone in the movie ends up putting their foot up on something. Chase does it frequently, but the Sheriff, the teens and even the hillbilly mechanic get in on the action. Joel and the bots start looking for when the next actor will “put their knee up” on something. While looking at a wrecked car, Tom has the Sheriff say, “You know a clever man could put his knee up on something like this.”

But the lizard on a rampage steals the show. Joel gives him a gruff voice (something he’d provide for most animals during his tenure on the show). As the Theremin induced music plays, Joel will give the lizard all kinds of silly lines. When some teens are making out and the lizard attacks, the camera provides a close-up on a screaming girl and then a close-up of the lizard’s face as his tongue shoots out. Joel says, “I’m your boyfriend now!” (a reference to Freddy in A Nightmare on Elm Street). Then there’s the scene where Chase tastes some water in a creek bed and The Giant Gila Monster exclaims “Hey, that’s my urine. Even I don’t do that!”

No one is spared from riffing. As the sheriff proclaims that the latest actions are out of his jurisdiction again, Tom shouts, “What is your jurisdiction?” Or when Chase’s French girlfriend hurries off to a meeting with him in a garage with an ornate roof (looking for all the world like the old architectural design for the International House of Pancakes) Crow says in a silly French accent, “Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruity for me!”

The host segments are mostly inspired by the film. Things start off silly when Tom and Crow are bonded together to be The Thing with Two Heads. For the invention exchange the mad scientists create punching bags of Renaissance Faire characters (most of the crew at Best Brains hated the Ren Faire, see Quest of the Delta Knights for more information). Joel creates a plot point specific radio that comes in very handy if you need exposition on the fly. For the first break Joel is inspired by the very narrow teen hangout in the film, and creates his own soda fountain in the laundry nook. At the next break Joel and the bots discuss their favorite funny drunks, based off the drunken hobo in the film. At the forth break the boys do a Criterion Collection style retrospective on the film style of the director Ray Kellogg. Basically all the blocking in the film revolves around someone putting their foot up on something.  When the movie ends the boys reveal their new rock band Hee-la. It all gets really silly.

For me the second half of the movie has the best riffing (and the most scenes with The Giant Gila Monster), but as a whole the entire episode is a lot of fun and worth seeking out.

I give it four renditions of “Sing Whenever I Sing” out of five.

This episode has an odd history on DVD. It was offered as a replacement for the episode Godzilla Vs. Megalon after Rhino got in trouble for releasing that episode. You’d get The Giant Gila Monster if you showed proof of purchase of the boxest with Godzilla vs. Megalon. The DVD was also available separately from Rhino shortly afterwards. These days it seems to be out of print, but is available as a download on Amazon.

Wasp Woman (1959)

Introduction:

Time for another crack at the 100 Sci-fi Classics, and this time it’s another trip to Roger Corman’s filmography. Will we get the competent Roger, who can make low budget but entertaining films. Or do we get the Roger who’s editing and execution renders even a potentially interesting script lifeless and dull. Maybe somewhere in between.

Summary:

Oh that nutty scientist Eric Zinthrop (Michael Mark) is at it again. He has taken the royal jelly from wasps and is using it to create an anti-aging serum. Janice Starlin (Susan Cabot) is looking for a product to stop the slide her cosmetic company is taking, so she jumps on this invention, no matter how shady Zinthrop appears. At first her secretary Mary (Barboura Morris) and one of her execs Bill (Anthony Eisley) are concerned that she is being conned. But when Janice uses the serum on herself and becomes younger and younger, they begin to wonder if the serum has been thoroughly tested. Well it wouldn’t be called “Wasp Woman” if it was, and soon employees start dying in the building and it looks more and more like Janice is experiencing some horrific side effects.

Good Points:

• Solid acting, especially by Susan Cabot
• Tries to have some social points in the script
• The Wasp Woman costume is hilarious

Bad Points:

• The opening scenes at the bee farm are too slow
• Long scenes of characters walking and a bad montage pad the film
• The Wasp Woman costume is hilarious

Overall:

Not as bad as it could have been, but the first twenty minutes or so are slow going. Once Janice starts shooting the royal jelly into her veins things get interesting and move quicker. Depending on your tolerance for silly costumes, the Wasp Woman will ruin or make the movie for you. This ]makes for a fun time with some friends, but as a solo view – not worth checking out.

Scores (out of 5)

Visual: 2

Sound: 2

Acting: 3

Music: 2

Script: 2

Direction: 2

Entertainment: 1

Total: 2

In Depth Review

I have to be in the mood for Mr. Corman and his brand of goofiness. I think I was in the mood for this one. It was just that Corman started his movie with a long slog of a sequence that seemed to go out of its way to bore you. For the first segment of the film we end up following Mr. Zinthrop around as he tends to his wasps. We get to visit a few beekeepers as well. These scenes are filled with characters walking… slowly. The dialogue is poor and the acting is some of the worst in the film. According to rumor this sequence was added later after it turned out that the original film was too short. That explains quite a bit, because while we get to see where Zinthrop was working before he was picked up by Starlin Cosmetics, it really doesn’t add much to the film. You don’t want to start your monster movie with long shots of men walking slowly.

Things pick up a little once we get to the cosmetics company mostly because Susan Cabot makes Janice Starlin an interesting character. The script offers some ideas about public perception of women’s beauty and how age relates to it. During the board meeting some of the execs feel that because Janice removed herself from the advertising the company has been doing poorly. Janice feels she looks too old to be the face of a company that promotes youth. Both counts may be correct, and Cabot does a good job making Janice feel frustration that her age and people’s perception of her age is affecting her success. Is she vain? A little, but her concern (at least in her first scenes) is for her company. In a way I’m making this sound a lot more interesting than it turns out to be, but I want to give Cabot credit for a performance went beyond the necessity of the script.

Still things meander along with Cabot dealing with her suspicious coworkers and a very long montage sequence of Zinthrop experimenting and checking on the experiments and of meetings and floating heads. I know it’s supposed to represent the passage of time, but it really slows the already slow movie down even more. An unexpected side effect is that all the montage material is made up of sequences we have seen already or end up seeing later – it’s Frankenstein’s montage! I’m guessing this little moment was used to pad out the run time a bit more.

So by the time we get to the good stuff it feels like a drop of water in a dry land. This occurs when one of the test subject cats grows tiny furry wing-like things on his back and attacks Zinthrop. It’s hilarious stuff and is injection of fun the movie needed. After that we see Janice in her mutated form, which is really some fuzzy gloves and a extremely silly looking mask with bizarre compound eyes and antenna. When she attacks anyone she basically rubs them with the mask and they secrete what looks like strawberry preserves. Great stuff for the B movie fan. But it’s so little so late it really doesn’t do much to elevate the entertainment. You could make a fun little short film out of the material here, but Corman’s final cut is around 73 minutes long and with nearly 20 minutes of it as meandering padding – well it’s a serious blow.

Visually and sound wise there is some basic competence but there are a few scenes where the dialogue it tough to hear but as the actors move closer to the camera (and the boom) they get louder. There are also a few dark scenes where it is difficult to discern what is happening. The print wasn’t very good and some of these issues may be related to that. The music is fairly limited and in a few moments distracts from the film.

In the end, the movie is a bit of a slog to make it through. A few bright spots of Corman style humor involving the secretaries actually has some interesting dialogue, but mostly the movie just doesn’t have enough of a plot to make carry longer than 20 minutes or so. This could have been a fun episode of a television series, an extremely goofy version of the “Twilight Zone” maybe. However, if you enjoy watching low budget monster flicks with some friends there is a lot to work with here. Fans of “Mystery Science theater 3000” can seek out the “Cinematic Titanic” release of this film which features commentary by cast and writers for MST3K. I’m sure they had a blast with it. Otherwise, those looking for a good monster movie with bug women should look elsewhere.