Each year us movie fans end
up settling in with our favorite holiday classics. Being brought up with a
family that celebrates Christmas, I enjoy watching Christmas films. There are
the classics that most folks enjoy; It’s
a Wonderful Life, Miracle on 34th Street, White Christmas or even biblical epics like Ben Hur.
But if you look off the
beaten path there are some Christmas films out there that don’t get mentioned,
but hell I enjoy them and they often hold a nostalgic place for my family and
me. And yes Mystery Science Theater episodes count.
One of the weirdest movies
I’ve ever seen. This Mexican take on the Santa Claus story is filled to
bursting with oddities. You get enslaved children workers, a huge, huge mouth,
Santa spying on people with a disturbing telescope, an imp from hell trying to
fight Santa and the horrible laughing reindeer. No, nothing can prepare you for
the terrors within. So if you seek this out, make sure it’s the Mystery Science Theater 3000 version,
with Mike and bots on hand to riff away.
Gremlins (1984)
Joe Dante’s demented dark
sense of humor, combined with his love of Loony Tunes and some of the most disgusting
death scenes ever enacted on puppets – it’s a holiday classic for sure. The
movie features all kinds of Christmas trappings, and Jerry Goldsmith even works
some Silent Night into the score.
Looking for something a bit nasty to counteract the wholesomeness this time of
year – look no further than a severed Gremlin head on the fire and the movie
ending with the town of Kingston Falls on fire.
Sure it borrows from The Terminator, but its all done in
good fun. Besides it’s got a futuristic cop hunting zombies in 1985 during
Christmas. Add in Helen Hunt dressed as a cute mall elf and it’s just too
awesome to describe. If you enjoy low budget sci-fi from the Regan years, this
is well worth checking out.
Die Hard (1988)
Want hard-hitting action
this Christmas? Look no further than one of the best action films of the ‘80s.
Bruce Willis is still great as McClane and Alan Rickman is still the slickest
bad guy we love to hate: Hans Gruber. But what really is amazing is how
director John McTiernan manages to keep the 131 minute film sailing along and
bursting with great lines and great pacing. If you haven’t seen it in a while,
give it another spin.
Take one silly kids movie
featuring one of the funniest looking robots in history, combine it with the
most annoying Martians in history and you’ve got a real winner for the riffing
crowd. Mystery Science Theater 3000
and Cinematic Titanic have both
tackled this film with plenty of laughs to be had. The theme song Hooray for Santee Claus is enough to
give you nightmares.
Scrooged (1988)
Richard Donner’s final
version of this film may be flawed, but there is so much to like here I give it
a pass. Bill Murray is excellent as Frank Cross, really giving is a nasty
character as well as the reformed Scrooge at the end. The interplay between the
TV special and the ghosts is hilarious. Danny Elfman gives us a darkly magical
score to accompany the action. Then there’s the ghosts, some of the funniest
and most creative seen in any version of A
Christmas Carol or any of its adaptations.
Muppet Christmas Carol (1992)
Or maybe you just want to
have some more felt in your Charles Dickens experience. Well here ya go, one of
the most fun adaptations of the story, and with all your favorite Muppets at
hand. Michael Caine is an excellent Scrooge and really works well with the rest
of the puppety cast. Add to that Paul Williams providing the song and lyrics
and you’ve got some of the catchiest tunes since the original Muppet Movie.
Hey don’t make that face at
me, part of this moronic police drama takes place during Christmas. Joe Don
Baker is a slovenly cop who annoys everyone he meets, sleeps with hookers, gets
in fights with Merlin Olsen and has his own theme song sung by Hoyt Axton. How
he’s supposed to be our hero is anyone’s guess, but there it is. This was the
final Mystery Science Theater 3000 episode
with Joel as the host, and its one of the funniest riffing sessions they ever
had. Fun to watch any time, but usually makes the rounds this time of year
because of the Christmas scene at John Saxon’s house.
A Russian fairy tale movie
about the magical Jack Frost (or Morozko, the Russian equivalent of Santa
Claus). I’m sure unedited; in its original aspect ratio and language this is a
fun fantasy film for children and adults alike. Some editing and dubbing later
and you’ve got a fever dream of epic proportions. A man with a bear head, a
conversation with flowers, a game of hide and seek with a mushroom man, a
cackling witch, an enchanted wooden pig sled and an evil black cat are mixed
into one story and unleashed on the audience. I love this movie for all its
sweetness and amazing visuals. I also love that Mike and bots riff on it in
this wonderful offering from Season Eight of Mystery Science Theater 3000.
This second film (also known as Midsummer's Eve) in the Tenchi Muyo series takes place during
summer, but has a bunch of flashbacks and talk about Christmas all the way
through it. While it helps to at least have seen some of Tenchi’s previous
adventures prior to giving this movie a spin, there’s lots of fun to be had.
This movie feels a lot closer to the original series made in 1992, and also to
that take on the characters. Ko Otani’s musical score is a mix of great synth
oriented themes, a sprinkling holiday cheer and excellent battle music. Ok, I
admit it, this is a very personal choice, but I enjoy watching it this time of
year or closer to Midsummer if the mood is right. Besides the end credits song
is about Christmas presents!
One of my favorite anime
directors, Satoshi Kon, delivers his most realistic film. It follows the
adventures for three homeless folks who find a baby in a dumpster and go on a
quest to return her to her parents. Along the way they have all kinds of
adventures and it culminates into one of the most amazing chase scenes in
animation history. A mixture of heart, silly humor and sadness, this is one
movie filled to the brim with the spirit of the holidays.
So give one of these movies
a shot next time you’re looking for something a little different around the
holidays.
